Is She Playing Hard To Get?
In today’s video I’m going to talk about playing hard to get.
I’ll get into why people do it and then I’ll give some tips for figuring out if they’re playing hard to get, or just aren’t interested.
People usually get frustrated and wonder do other people play hard to get? Simple. It works. It works for several reasons.
When someone plays hard to get with you, It causes anxiety. As I explain in other videos, anxiety is the root of desire.So when someone takes a while to respond, it triggers our anxiety, and causes us to desire them more.
The essence of romance is Uncertainty. I always talk about if I condensed romance into a picture. It’s the He Loves me, He Loves me not.
We have to balance a fine line. If we come on too strong or appear too eager, they flee and run away like they’re getting out of Shawshank.
Here’s another interesting fact. In Helen Fishers book. She writes: Early acquisition of a reward reduces the duration of intensity of dopamine activity in brain
Delay in winning stimulates. In other words, playing hard to get excites a suitor
So if you were a prize on a game show, playing hard to get would make you go from a Toyota to a Corvette. You become a bigger prize
This is why I talk to you guys about taking your time getting to know someone. This is why I say to take out a girl once a week.
When you come on too strong and too fast, it makes you less valuable. If she saw you as a Corvette at first, now you become the Toyota.
I got an email from who says: Hey Craig, I could really use your help. I get really confused about when a woman plays hard to get. I went out on a date with this girl and we had an amazing time. She came back to my place and things got pretty intense. We didn’t have sex, but did everything else. I really liked her and it was the best date I had in a long time.
I texted her back the next evening around 9 pm and she didn’t reply. I called the next day and she texted back saying she would call me the following day. I find myself thinking about her more. But I’m not sure if she has just lost all interest in me.
We talked that day and it was a good talk. She said she was a little disappointed that I waited until that next night to hear from her. I told her that I don’t usually text women the following day. She was honest and said she doesn’t like to play games and we had a good talk about it.
I tried to set up plans but she said she might be going out of town. She said she would call me the following day to let me know. She didn’t call so because we had an honest talk with her about playing games I called. She didn’t pick up so I left a message. That was yesterday, I haven’t heard back yet.
Women are emotional creatures. It could be anything. It sounds like she does like you so just be confident and relax.
Maybe she doesn’t want to appear too easy.
She wants to make sure you are really interested in her and not just hooking up. A lot of men will have just want to have sex.
If she makes sure you are really hanging around it shows you really do care about her as a person. If it was just sex, you would probably give up easier.
A lot of times, women want to make sure you’re really interested before they commit to liking you.
They want to know a man is invested in her. Biologically they have a lot more at risk. If they get pregnant and the guy isn’t attached. She has to raise this child by herself.
Here are some other reasons women play hard to get.
It tests a man to see how he will react. She wants to see how you might handle challenging behavior. Will you get angry? Will you freak out? If so, she knows you are not internally confident and secure and she can weed you out right away.
Think about it from an investment standpoint. If all she has to do is wait an extra day to see what kind of a man you are, wouldn’t it be worth that 24 hours. It could save her 6 months of getting to know you.
Here are some tips to look for: You want to learn how to read her signals of interest.
Is there another guy in the picture? Is she me blowing me off or playing hard to get?
If she’s busy but she has an opening? How long are her text messages to you?
If you call and she doesn’t pick up. She may not call back right away but she texts back and explains why she can’t pick up.
Flirts and then pulls away. She talks about other guys to make you jealous. To see if you’re interested.
So you have to understand just because a woman takes her time getting back to you, it doesn’t necessarily mean she doesn’t like you. She might like you a lot and she wants to keep you around.
Don’t worry about all the details or what a woman does – just keep moving things forward with confidence.
Even if her interest level seems a little bit low, lower your interest level, when you guys get in touch, ask her for a date and gauge her interest level.