What To Do If Your Ex Ignores You
Have you ever been ignored? Of course! At some point it happens to us all.
Being ignored is incredibly painful. Even if you are feeling ignored it hurts just as much to feel ignored as if we are. It doesn’t matter if it is real or imagined… it hurts just as much.
Sometimes you don’t know if they’re ignoring you or not. It can make you go crazy. You can have friends ignore you and it bothers you.
We reach out and they ignore us. It literally causes us physical pain. There is a biological component behind it. Its like a warning of death.
Part of the reason we have society and relationships is to stay safe and when you are outside of those norms you are rejected. Putting you in isolation which means danger.
The person that ignores you… They have the power in that situation. When you continue to reach out it makes you appear to be more powerless and in control and gives you less power.
People do not do well with power in relationships. I see this all the time. There has to be a certain balance and equality. Without it, one person is powerless the other controls everything.
When they control everything, they lose attraction.
Today's email is from a woman in her late 20s dating a guy in his mid 30s for about a year
His Mom is bus driver and dad retired. Very nice friendly people.
What were their reasons for breaking up with you? He said I betrayed his trust. We slept together I was about to get my period and I didn’t took the baby pill, next day he got me a 72 hours pill just in case but I never took it cause it wasn’t serious for me I told him and he got furious and broke up.
How did you handle the break up/ how did you act?
I was devastated, I begged for a chance, I got sick and lost 15 pounds. I apologized cause I never meant to hurt him or betray him never. I was hurt that he even thinks that.
What did your ex say was the 2 biggest problems in the relationship were? My attitude, and negativity
What is your question?
Craig my ex won’t talk to me he reads my messages but ignores. I found out he is texting other women. Which broke my heart.
He told me he would think and give me a final decision. I think he wants to see where it’s going with this other girl
I asked him a lot of times if he wants me to leave but he won’t tell me. Why Craig ?
I’m scared to lose him. He didn’t block me but he keeps reading my messages and ignores it’s been 4 weeks like that.
I’m so scared I miss him so much. Help me what should I do?
Craig: Tough situation. There's a lot going on. He's ignoring your messages. You also learned that he is texting other women, so we know he is looking to see what else is out there (as far as options). He said he would get back to you and give you his "final decision". I think he hasn't done that yet because he has you as a back up right now (to see if there is another option he likes more).
He is exploring how things go with these new women, and if it goes well with them, he'll cut you loose.
Now, we know that he hasn't blocked you, but you do not want to keep reaching out to this guy. We know that he's talking to other women AND he's ignoring you.
If someone ignores you, I don't think you should continue to pursue them. If someone ignores me, I move on. That's the healthiest attitude to have with people. Putting yourself first. Not putting them before you and acting like they are more important than you are.
It is incredibly painful to be ignored by someone. And it's incredibly scary to fear losing someone. But, you need to get some power back for yourself. He needs to start missing you.
You need to stop any further movement. They have to realize that they are going to lose you if they don't do something about things.
Are you struggling with your breakup? My workbook series The Knowledge, is available now! It will help you grow, change, and re-attract your ex. Click the link below.